Menangkuk di Air yang Keruh - Taking Advantage

Assalamualaikum all!

Few weeks ago, a news of a Malaysian couple been held in Sweden fro beating child who did not pray had cause a phenomenon in Malaysia. A lot of citizens expressed their anger on Sweden government for detaining the couple and put the children under non-muslim foster home. To read more, you can find the article here.

I felt sorry for the couple and the kids. For the couple who tried their best as parents to teach their children. For the children for being apart from their parents and living with strangers in other people's country.

The pressure from the media and Malaysians make the government to give extra attention to the case. As the Malaysian government failed to negotiate with Sweden authorities to release the couple, but they managed to bring back the kids to their home country.

About the allegation to the couple, it is unfortunate that the incident happened on in Malaysia soil. It happened in Sweden where the law forbid parents spanking their children. As Muslims, we are allow to hit our children in a way of teaching them, when they are baligh, when your intention is to teach them, not to hurt them. It will be a debate from non-Muslim on what is the borderline of teaching and hurting the children. Now, that needs a deep research for that as I won't explain about it here.

Till this post published, the couple are still in the hand of Sweden authorities. But rumors said, they will easily walk away because of the different culture. Wallahualam. I wish all the best to the couple and pray for their safety.

As the children, all of them are safely landed in their home country and now are under their relative's care. The kids had been in international and barely speak Malay language, their parents' native language and Malaysia national language. As their mother specifically mentioned to the minister that helped to be bring them back to Malaysia to enroll her children in public school.

Common sense tells us that it will be trouble during the transition; language barrier, different syllybus, different environment and routine plus no parents to ease them during this hard time. However as a human being, they will adapt. They have all the support from their relatives to many other concern Malaysians.

However, I saw a very obvious move from a private company that try to take advantage from this crisis. I read this article and felt the rush of anger all over myself. Frankly, I just feel angry. Education is every human needs, regardless whoever you are. Everybody has fair amount of chances to receive good education. Plus, it is free in Malaysia. However, there are many children in Malaysia who fail to receive education due to their background. Some live deep in the forest/ jungle, some are poor that have to earn money for living instead of attending school and some are being taken advantage by other irresponsible party to work/ asking donation around. Many cases in Malaysia that children been exploited by 'islamic school' to ask for 'donation'. This is a heavy crime because taking advantage on minor. 

So, to Datuk Hassan Harun, owner of Wadi Sofia College, I'm not impress with your move of offering the kids some place at your international school. Because there children are entitle and have no issue in enrolling into public school plus their father is employed by agency that already taking care of the children welfare. 

I'm more than I'm impress, best word is grateful, if you help to release those 'tahfiz students' who are entangled in human exploitation by irresponsible party. I'm impress too if you, Datuk Hassan Harun extend your offer to excellent students who have to leave school because have to help their family to earn for living. 

I'm glad that the children of this couple didn't put let this college to get 10 seconds fame by accepting his offer. The children are happy to school in public school, like the rest of other citizens. 

Refugees crisis in host country: Who to be blame?

Assalamualaikum!

I've been busy, busy, busy with many, many, many things. That's explained why I seldom blogging lately. Actually there are many things in my mind that I love to pour out here, but time envy me. I have very little time to spend on jotting down my thoughts and opinions.

Well, yesterday, my husband told me that his colleague is the son to one Malaysian activist. When I found out who is his mother, it flashed automatically on her report about refugees in Malaysia and on how they been treated by local authorities. 

I believe everybody has soft spot for refugees. They have to leave their country, without their belongings, walk for thousands miles into other's country, hoping people to accept them. Many countries in the world open their border for refugees, e.g Egypt, Jordan, Lebanon, France, Malaysia, Indonesia and many others. Many countries open opportunity for resettlement program like the USA, Australia, New Zealand and Norway. 

Many stories reported that host countries ill treated those refugees. I take Malaysia, my country, for example. Reports by activists that Malaysians and the local authorities give poor treatment to the refugees been spread throughout the world. Malaysia, a country that is full of immigrants from many countries, like China, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Nepal, Indonesia, Philippines; just naming a few. And yet Malaysia plays a role as host countries to asylum seekers from Iran, Iraq, Myanmar, Pakistan, India; to name a few. 

Being a host country is not easy as it sounds like. It is noble, but not easy. Take example that people come and stay at your house. You have your own rules and not people have their own way that sometimes isn't tally with your way. The refugees that come to other countries, bring along their way of lifestyle, which most of the time doesn't fit in the local society. For example, it is normal for some refugees parents to let their kids play freely at outside. But to the host country, it is a dangerous move to let the kids play alone as the kidnap, rape and murder cases are uprising. With that, it adds the problem to the host country to curb the cross culture issue. 

The refugees as well, that illegally enter the host country, will quietly try to blend with local community. With this, it meant that they will be a part of the host country's economy growth by taking up job. This will increase the competition with the local workers. This also will bring unhealthy competition as most of the refugees are unskilled workers but they are the chosen ones because the labor cost is cheaper than the local who are semi-skilled worker. This issue will create another problem; low quality end result. 

Refugees normally come from poor or undeveloped countries. They are also been neglected by their ruled government. Mostly they are not vaccinated and largely they enter the host country with diseases. This will increase the host country's medical expenditure. The refugees who need medical assistance should be treated because if fail it will spread to local citizens. The refugees in Malaysia also practice poor hygiene and have not much knowledge hygiene and diseases. I experienced a family who came for interview for resettlement program where two of the family members were having chicken pox. They were happy sipping soda drinks outside of my room and acted as if nothing unusual happened. When I questioned the head of the family member, he didn't know what happen to his daughters and I had to become the doctor, explaining about chicken pox to the family, and that the daughters shouldn't go out publicly as they might spread the disease to others. 

No country loves to have prison. Common sense tells us that having prison and detention center bring nothing but a burden to the country. We will be wasting tax payers money by supporting the inmates expenses on food and lodging, the maintenance of the facilities and human resource mobilization. However, in my home country, Malaysia, we have several immigrant detention center. Who is in there? Some of them are refugees. But why are they there? Because they offend the host country's home rules. It is an ideal situation if the refugees stay rationally in the host country. However, we can't deny that they are human like us, too. And they have the ability to make mistake like local citizens that validate them to be place in local detention center or prison. But what made them stay in the detention center longer than they should be? Many factors lead to this; for example, the language barrier. I used to work with translator when I interviewed the refugees. I have no idea why don't they try to learn to speak in local language or at least English. Perhaps because they live among their community in host country. The refugees also always tend to be detained longer than they should because of their capability in committing crime. The refugees mostly come from torn country where crime and violence are common scene in their daily life. So, when they come to their host country, they tend to bring in their previous lifestyle. And the locals take advantage by hiring them to commit crime and it traps the refugees. Who to be blame? the refugees who commit crime or locals who take advantage on them? But most of activist will blame the local authorities for detaining them. 

I read an article written by local activist on the detention camp in Malaysia; on how the authorities treat the refugees and the condition of the detention camp. I believe the above explained the situation and we should stop blaming one or another, but we should work together to make our country a better place to live. 

1. I believe most local authorities will put their integrity at the highest place when they carry out their duty. 

2. I believe the host country citizens have sympathy on the refugees. Not many, but some enjoy taking advantage on other's weaknesses and this is what happening to the refugees.

3. Although it is an unfortunate event to what happen to the refugees, but they have full responsible towards themselves. To are many organisations and agencies that protect them and guide them to blend with local. The refugees are urge to drop the 'old' lifestyle and adopt a new way according to the host country culture, to make your transition easier. 

4. To the activists, stop pointing fingers to your local authorities or local people, but work more on how to help the refugees to blend in our society. 

5. I believe everybody welcome guests with open hand, as long as the guests wouldn't bite their host's hand.

Routine- tips to change your lifestyle

Assalamualaikum and how are you? We are fine on this hot summer. It is 31 degrees at 9 pm!

Have you taken your breakfast? And where did you have it? When I was in Malaysia and still working, I usually have it at home or sometimes I spent at outside with my friends. During weekend, Juma and I would bring the kids to mamak join or Mc Donald for breakfast. Worst come to worst, he would packed some food for us. The idea is not to cook at home. Usually we will have roti canai (paratha) or tosei or nasi lemak. The drink will be teh tarik or any ice drink.

And this is the routine that I brought together with me to Australia. My husband, who love me endlessly, went along with it. Every weekend, since I reached Perth, he would bring me to Canning Vale market where we can purchase nasi lemak at AUD 3.50 and a cup of coffee at AUD4.00. The nasi lemak tasted awful, cold as it just came out from the fridge; totally opposite from the way it suppose to taste like. The coffee was good but with AUD 4.00, I could get more than only a cup of coffee.

It hit me hard at that time, to revalue our expenses, to adapt with the changes and to give up few routines. From then on, we stopped having breakfast at outside, we dine out once in a month, plan our groceries expenses and buy second hand stuff at garage sale, instead of buying new things at mall. 

Malaysia, my home country is having hard time in terms of financial wise. The citizens are urge to cut their expenses. I believe it is not hard to do it as long as you are willing to change your lifestyle. Here are some tips: 

1. Food: pack food for your lunch. It is cheaper to buy raw material and cook by yourself then to eat out. And it is way healthier. 

2. Food: stop going to fine dining places. Yes, stop! They charge more than they should, in the name of service. It is delicious? Cook by yourself! It is not difficult plus it is gonna be fun!

3. Clothes and shoes: stop buying branded clothes. Many affordable labels offer high quality product at reasonable price. 

4. Clothes and shoes: if you have children, pass down their older sibling's clothes to the younger, if the condition is still fine. It's fine to wear mint condition clothes. Nothing to be ashamed of. So does clothes. You can pass it around with your friends or siblings too. Sharing is caring. 

5. Clothes and shoes: if you have too many clothes, do spring cleaning and donate the ones that you can't use it anymore. Or the one that you seldom use. Somebody's trash is other's treasure. 

6. Travelling: if your office could be access by public transport, it is wise to use it rather than to use your own transport. You can save on fuel and parking fees. I understand that the public transportation always crowded, but you can always start your journey early. Plan your journey. 

7. Travelling: You can do car pool as well. I've done this before and it is fun! There's always somebody to chat with while being stuck in the traffic jam. Plus cost saving! 

8. Leisure: Instead of bringing your family to shopping malls during weekend, why don't you bring them for picnic? Parks usually offer lots of free parking lot and bring home cook meal for picnic. But make sure you clean up the area after finish. Or make little gathering with your friends, like pot luck. Take turn to organise. 

9. Car: Buy car according to our budget. It is an essential item, however, people nowadays take it wrongly. They 'dress up' their car that towards the end, they left no money for food and other important things. Prioritize your needs. It becomes a culture to change car whenever they finish pay up the loan. Free yourself from loan! Look, if you drive to work, most of the time your car will be park at the car park. It means that most of the time in a day you don't need it. So live with what you have. Unless the car gives you such a big trouble; e.g the cost of maintenance is high, your family expanding, don't change your car. It will save up lots of your income. 

10. Party/ wedding/ Aqiqah: As saying said, you get married once in your life time. Make it a memorable one. But many take this saying wrongly. They thought it should be an extravagant wedding to match the word memorable. With this, the cost of the wedding bomb up, more than they afford. The dais, the gifts, the wedding outfit, the doorgift, the food and the list goes on and on. I'm afraid that the memory that you get from your wedding is working extra hard to earn extra money for the event. Or climbing the bank stairs while applying for bank loan. This can be avoid if you know how to match your wedding budget with your own budget. Be realistic. Stop thinking about others think. Think of your future, think of the money that you can save to give your new family a better life. Same goes to your kid's birthday party or aqiqah event. It's fine to spend some money to celebrate your love ones as long as it is not wasting. 

There are many more ways to save up our money to make our future brighter. Just remember, our live is not at the up always, At a time, we will be at down. So this is the time for you to save up to cushion yourself when you at the bottom. 

Me-Time

Assalamualaikum! 

How's your day so far. Mine is good, but seems it is summer, the weather is pretty hot and it kinds of driving my spirit away. Once the clock ticks to 1pm, my eyes will automatically calling for a shut off. Argghh!!

Alhamdullilah for today, my strength to stay awake is stronger and here I am, enjoying my me-time. I'm sitting on the sofa, laptop on my lap and writing this blog. Yes, that is my me-time. 

I think you are having a time off for yourself when you are reading this. And I hope I feed you with something worthy because time is precious for mothers. How do you define me-time? To ma, anything free from work, kids and something that I can on my own without worrying about anything- is a me-time. But how I enjoy my me-time is different from the time I have a child and when I have two children. 

Back when I had Maleec without Aaron, my me-time means out to the shopping mall, or pampering myself in spa, or hanging out with friends in cafe. And when I was in Malaysia, it was affordable to have that kind of me-time as well. I sent them to my mother-in-law and off I go. But it is not usually happened. Perhaps once in a blue moon. 

But now, since I'm alone in Perth, me-time is having a complete time for myself on bed while Aaron and Maleec are playing, or when Aaron is sleeping and Maleec is watching television, or when their daddy takes care of them. I also enjoy watching tv series on my laptop, but it only happens when all my kids are fast asleep at night. 

I don't think I have more me-time when I have a child compare to when I have two children. But the way I enjoy it is different.

How about working mothers? When do they find their me-time? In my opinion, working mother has more me-time than stay at home mother. While at work, you are child-free, out for lunch with friends, have time not to think about you house condition. But again, the definition depends on how you see the situation. 

Time for yourself wouldn't come to you as a mother, but you have to earn it. manage your time, manage your expectation and in shaa allah, you will find it. If you have some spare time, use it wisely, because time is precious. 

Cheers!

Random: Celebrities and Politicians

Salam all... greetings from Ipoh! How are you today? I'm in Ipoh with my family. It is suppose to be a holiday for me and the kids while Juma is attending some work at UTP. However, we are stuck in the hotel due to no transportation. Juma uses the car to work and with that, we have no car left for us to go around the town, except for waiting him to get back. 

Well, this post is quite random. Let's take a look at what is happening around us. 

1. Nabila Huda and her new boyfriend. 

Who is she? She is an actress and daughter to famous Malaysian rocker, Amy Search. She is a divorcee and her taste in fashion is always a top story in Malaysia celebrity world. Lately, she told the press that she is in love and wants the whole world to see her happiness. But the most foolish mark from her is when she quoted to the media that the guy is not her boyfriend but rather to be call as her soulmate. Wow! That's pretty fast for me to give that title to a person. Let us see how long will this relationship last. 

p/s: Sorry, can't post more pictures. Me is holding myself from vomit. 

2. Muhammad bin Muhammad Taib  (Mat Taib) joins PAS

Former UMNO vice president and Selangor Menteri Besar has joined PAS, a religious party and comment that although Barisan Nasional had done a lot to Malaysia development, but the party isn't relevant anymore. He also told the press that he wants to see school children (girls) and tv presenter (ladies) to wear head scarf. I totally agree with the idea because keeping our aurat is nothing negotiable. But, look at his daughter. She is a singer and not wearing hijab. So, how are you going to educate others if you fail to educate your own child? But nothing is surprising about the man who hold the name Muhammad twice. He elope late Sultan Selangor's daughter and got married in South Thailand. He also had to stepped down from his Menteri Besar p0st after been arrested in Australia for not declaring the money he brought into the country. How much that he brought in? It was RM3.8 million. It is kind of a lot for a former teacher who left the job to be a politician. Come on PAS! Are you to desperate to conquer Putrajaya till you invite this kind of man to your campaign talk? How sad!

Him and Ku Yah

His daughter while contesting in a dance competition

3. Reese Witherspoon lost her coolness

I think she is super talented as an actress and she personally has not much wild gossip surround her from the beginning of her career till last week. It was a surprise that she been arrested along with her hubby. Her husband was charge for driving under influence (DUI) while she... err.. for being rude to the police. Reese, who was drunk during the arrest time was questioning the Atlanta police whether he know her name. Her arrogant behaviour perhaps is her alter ego when she is drunk. Look at how the alcohol could do the damage to you. The good reputation that she built all this while gone at one night, because of the alcohol. That's why Islam doesn't allow Muslim to take alcohol. 

The couple mugshot, source: TMZ

4. Celebrities and Gaza

World pities the fate of Palestinians and condemns Israel's attacks towards Palestine. In Malaysia, many initiatives are done in the name of humanity towards Palestinians like donation, education opportunity and so forth. And lately, few celebrities visit Palestine, for many purpose. For documentation shooting, to charity work and for business purposes. That is good because the more people be there, the more exposure the rest will get about Palestine. But what trouble me is the celebrities comment on their feeling when they were there. They said that they feel peaceful when they are in Palestine because the people are redha on what's going on with them and they take it as Allah's test on them. The question is, do you need to get your ass to get the feeling of peaceful and take it as Allah test when you feel down (or high)? I think when you get the concept, you will feel peaceful in anywhere. Peace out!

Heliza Helmi

Aishah Sinclair

Yatt Hamzah

Fara Fauzana

 p/s: I really HATE to see Muslim ladies who wear hijab 'halfway' like Fara Fauzana shown. It feels like telling the world that I'm not wearing hijab in daily basis but I have to wear it at certain occasion. What a shame!

Your Life is in My Hand

Assalamualaikum. How are you today? For me, nothing much different with yesterday. My husband is still in Bangkok, Hans Isaac is still not able to marry Neelofa, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have their own wine label and Sulu terrorists are still in Sabah. 

 Few days ago, Malaysia been surprised with the news of a singer who beat her husband till death. She is the main suspect of the case, along with her two nephews. From the media, I learned that she and her nephews tied her estranged husband and beat him till death. This i to stop the husband from requesting to see their child. They are in the midst of divorce. Today, through a gossip column, a friend of the singer claims that she is the last person that the singer spoke to before she been detained by police. The friend told the media that the case is a self defense case as the husband attacked her first. The husband crashed into the house and started to beat her in front of her nephews. The nephews didn't help her until she was dropped to the floor. Both of her nephews managed to stop her husband from beating her and they used belt to tie him up. 

My question is, what is the reason can a person kill another person that they love or loved? This is not the first case we hear about a person kill their partner. How about the child kill their parents? From love to hate, what could trigger the action of killing your love ones?

From the story above and if the friend's story is the truth, the singer is not only defending her child, she also defending herself. Why she has to do the dirty work where as she can call for police's help? Perhaps the law is not securing her life and her child that she has to do what is beyond human right. 

Life is like a wheel, sometimes you are up and sometimes you are down. When we are at up, we should not forget that we might be down, too.  In making decision, we have to use our brain, not only by listening our heart. Think the consequences of the action that you plan to take. Don't do kit just because you think that is the short cut of getting out from the trouble. Think before you act. 

But the question again, how could you ended the life of the person you love? The life that we are leading is very stressful and full of surprises. We will be surprise with a person's capability to do many things that we are not think of. For example, a husband loves the wife unconditionally could kill the wife while she is nurturing their baby simply because the wife is nagging at the husband on his absence during the child delivery. 

So, be careful with your words and action. Don't think about yourself only, but think about others too. If you are tired, what make you think your partner is not tired as well. Try to avoid unnecessary argument as small matter could lead to big mistake. 

As the story I told above, if happen to be the court decided that the singer is at fault of killing her husband, their children is not only losing the father, bit also the mother. 

To my dear friends, I'm not perfect. I easily get angry especially with my kids and husband due to housework and many other reasons. But we have to think rationally on our action as we have to be responsible on that. This post is a reminder to me to always put my mind above my heart. 

Good night!

Let's get there!

**Everytime I want to start blogging, it will end I'm browsing the Facebook pages, read gossip blogs.. bla.. bla.. bla! Such a distraction! Focus, Fatin, focus!

I bet every of you have a dream place to visit. Many of us work hard to achieve those dreams. But others (like me), we just live with the dream. We will keep on dreaming till we wake up.

But I want to dream out loud by sharing it with you. I'm a person who love to be at the beach or visit big city and try to blend in. I'm not into historic place (though I love History subject) or exploring the thick forest or climbing the mountain. !Warning! I might update this post from time to time as I might add the latest dream place I wanna go!

1. Malta

I know about this country from a friend of mine who visited the place with her mother. From then on, I started to search about the country and its beach. The more I see the picture of the blue Mediterranean ocean and the beautiful Azure Window, make me feel like going there now!

2. Cabo San Lucas, Mexico

This is one of the favorite place for Lauren Conrad. And I love to go there too! This is my first choice for honeymoon, but Juma refused to get there as it is goddamn far away from MY. And there isn't any direct flight from MY to Cabo (obviously!). But I can imagine myself, lying at the beach, tanning my skin while watching handsome guys pass by!

3. Greece

Ok! I speak too soon! This is one of the historic place I want to visit. And also the geography of the country is unique.

Omg! I'm so sleepy! Will continue soon!!